I Am the ‘Boys Have a Penis’ Kid from the Classic 1990 Film: A Candid Conversation.

The Austrian Oak is rightfully celebrated as an Hollywood heavyweight. Yet, during the peak of his cinematic dominance in the 1980s and 1990s, he also delivered several genuinely hilarious comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its three-and-a-half decade milestone this December.

The Story and That Line

In the hit comedy, Schwarzenegger portrays a tough police officer who goes undercover as a elementary educator to locate a fugitive. During the story, the procedural element acts as a loose framework for Arnold to have charming scenes with children. Without a doubt the standout belongs to a child named Joseph, who out of nowhere stands up and declares the actor, “Males have a penis, girls have a vagina.” The Terminator responds dryly, “Thank you for that information.”

That iconic child was played by child star Miko Hughes. His career included a notable part on Full House as the bully to the Olsen twins and the character of the youngster who comes back in the film version of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with several projects on the horizon. He also frequently attends the con circuit. Not long ago shared his recollections from the filming of the classic after all this time.

A Young Actor's Perspective

Q: To begin, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I believe I was four. I was the smallest of all the kids on set.

That's remarkable, I can't remember being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're brief images. They're like mental photographs.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would take me to auditions. Sometimes it was an open call. There'd be dozens of children and we'd all patiently queue, go into the room, be in there less than five minutes, do whatever little line they wanted and that's all. My parents would help me learn the words and then, once I learned to read, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your impression of him?

He was extremely gentle. He was enjoyable. He was nice, which I guess stands to reason. It would be strange if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that surely wouldn't foster a good work environment. He was fun to be around.

“It would be strange if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom.”

I understood he was a big action star because that's what my parents told me, but I had barely seen his movies. I knew the air around him — he was a big deal — but he didn't frighten me. He was simply playful and I just wanted to play with him when he was available. He was occupied, of course, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would cling to his muscles. He'd tense up and we'd be dangling there. He was really, really generous. He gifted all the students in the classroom a personal stereo, which at the time was a major status symbol. It was the coolest device, that funky old yellow cassette player. I listened to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It finally gave out. I also received a real silver whistle. He had the referee's whistle, and the kids all got a whistle as well.

Do you remember your time filming as being positive?

You know, it's amusing, that movie is such a landmark. It was a huge film, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, the legendary director, visiting Astoria, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the meat from the top. Then, the Nintendo Game Boy was brand new. That was the big craze, and I was proficient. I was the smallest kid and some of the older kids would hand me their devices to pass certain levels on games because I was able to, and I was really proud of that. So, it's all little kid memories.

That Famous Quote

OK, the infamous quote, do you remember anything about it? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word shocking meant, but I understood it was edgy and it got a big laugh. I was aware it was kind of something I wouldn't usually utter, but I was given special permission in this case because it was comedic.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it originated, from what I understand, was they didn't have specific roles. Certain bits of dialogue were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it was more of a collaboration, but they refined it on set and, I suppose someone in charge came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "Let me think about it, I need time" and took a day or two. It was a tough call for her. She said she had doubts, but she felt it could end up as one of the unforgettable moments from the movie and history proved her correct.